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Have we got the definition of a strong woman wrong?

Have we got the definition of a strong woman wrong?

How would you define a strong woman? Perhaps you might use some of the following descriptions: Physically strong Confident Hard to persuade Unflappable Resilient Determined Independent In control Focused on her goals.   I used to think that being a strong woman...

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How our children invite us to learn and grow

How our children invite us to learn and grow

Have you ever heard that saying that goes something like “I was a much better parent before I had children”? I love it. Parenting is often much harder than we expect. We imagine that parenting will involve joyous afternoons at the park, quiet snuggles on the lounge (I...

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Using your values to create a rich and fulfilling life

Using your values to create a rich and fulfilling life

Do you know what your personal values are? Defining and aligning to our personal values can help us feel motivated, inspired and live a rich and meaningful life. When we know what’s most important to us we can look for ways to have more of this in our lives. In...

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How to ask for help

How to ask for help

You know you need some help and you’ve decided you’re going to ask for it. That’s a huge step in itself. Asking for help can be really hard, especially for mothers in modern society where there are some very unrealistic expectations placed on women to do it all,...

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Why it’s so hard to ask for help

Why it’s so hard to ask for help

“Can you help me?” Four little words. They seem so simple yet mothers everywhere find them near impossible to say. What makes it hard is the meaning we attribute to asking for help. Without that meaning, asking for help is a neutral activity, neither positive or...

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Automatic Negative Thoughts: How to Identify and Manage Them

Automatic Negative Thoughts: How to Identify and Manage Them

Automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) are stories that we tell ourselves that aren’t necessarily true. They are distortions or negative interpretations of ourselves, what is happening around us, the past or the future, based on our beliefs and assumptions. ANTs happen...

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Why mothers need to speak up instead of staying silent

Why mothers need to speak up instead of staying silent

Have there been times when you have you kept quiet when you had something to say? For example, when... Someone crossed your boundary or hurt you? Another child mistreated your child? You didn’t want to do something you were being asked to do? You didn’t agree? Someone...

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The truth about the difficult emotions of motherhood

The truth about the difficult emotions of motherhood

Sadness, burnout, fear, guilt, anxiety, loneliness, frustration, anger, resentment, shame, embarrassment, disgust. Mothers feel them. But often we don’t like to talk about them. What will people think? If perfect mum is always composed, in control, calm, happy, on top...

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Think you might be a perfectionist? 10 signs to look for

Think you might be a perfectionist? 10 signs to look for

Perfectionism is patterns of thinking and behaviours driven by the constant need to be or appear perfect (without flaws). It could also be described as the need to avoid being inadequate (anything less than perfect). For many years I proudly called myself a...

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How to interrupt the pattern of self blame

How to interrupt the pattern of self blame

When my son was 4, he was playing in the playground after kindergarten and decided to give the monkey bars a try. He always watched the other children swinging across but still liked me to hold him as he moved his arms from bar to bar. This time he wanted to do it...

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Learning the art of letting go. Again.

Learning the art of letting go. Again.

Letting go is a lesson and practice we live through over and over again. Life continues to present us with new opportunities to let go and sometimes we have such a tight grip on things, it takes several attempts to fully release. I love this quote from Ahjan Chah: “If...

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How to stop rushing through life

How to stop rushing through life

Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...

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Are your expectations creating the reality you want?

Are your expectations creating the reality you want?

When my son was about 16 months old, I started to think about returning to work. I'd always expected I would return to the demanding corporate job that I loved. That’s what career women do. I expected I would place my son in childcare. That’s what working mothers do....

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How to deal with a bad day

How to deal with a bad day

I know that we’re expected to be loving motherhood, sailing through each day with a smile on our faces. That’s the myth of the perfect mum. In reality, we all have bad days and we don’t have to pretend that everything is wonderful when it’s not. Allowing ourselves to...

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When self-care feels like another thing you have to get right

When self-care feels like another thing you have to get right

Ever feel like you’re getting this self-care thing wrong? Not doing enough or doing too much. Not wanting to do it, not enjoying it enough or doing it with so much guilt. Not being consistent, not sticking to your plans or not starting at all. Not doing the right...

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Goodbye perfectionism, I don’t need you anymore

Goodbye perfectionism, I don’t need you anymore

Dear Perfectionism, I’ve decided it’s time we parted ways. We’ve been together a long time. I’m not even sure how it happened, but somewhere in childhood you became my constant companion. You came with me into adulthood and by that time I thought you were an asset. I...

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When you feel like you’ve lost your identity in motherhood

When you feel like you’ve lost your identity in motherhood

I don't know about you, but no one ever mentioned to me that motherhood might change who I am.  I received plenty of advice and information about how to care for my baby and some guidance around how to tend to my own practical needs, like sleep, nutrition and...

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How to deal with anger in motherhood – Part 2

How to deal with anger in motherhood – Part 2

Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...

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How to deal with anger in motherhood – Part 1

How to deal with anger in motherhood – Part 1

I’m fascinated by volcanoes. My heart raced with excitement and awe when I stood in the hot steam rising from the ground, walked across kilometres of lava rock, and flew in a helicopter over the crater of the active volcano in Hawaii.          When...

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5 things that help create balance in your life

5 things that help create balance in your life

Balance. It can be a tricky topic. Some women idealise the concept of balance and are constantly trying to achieve it. Others reject the idea that it’s possible and refuse to use the word at all. Some prefer to call it integration or harmony. Let's have a quick look...

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The beliefs that are making it hard for you to take a break

The beliefs that are making it hard for you to take a break

Does taking a break feel impossible? The sheer thought it makes you anxious or uncomfortable? Motherhood can feel all consuming, and when you add all the other responsibilities you're carrying, there just doesn’t seem to be time for a break. I’m not even necessarily...

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How to make exercise easier and boost your mood

How to make exercise easier and boost your mood

Many mums have told me that while they know exercise is important for wellbeing, they struggle to make it a part of their regular activities. That's why I've invited Claire Cole, Personal Trainer and Founder of Movement for Mums, to share her insights into how to make...

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Gut health – why is it so important?

Gut health – why is it so important?

You may have heard the buzz around gut health lately. It seems like gut health is the new “in vogue” thing when it comes to the health industry and the products marketed to us at the moment. Luckily, this is one trend that I can really get behind, because the...

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Why a good enough mother is truly good enough

Why a good enough mother is truly good enough

Do you feel like you’re constantly comparing yourself or being compared to the ideal of a perfect mother? With so much information and advice out there “helping” us to get things “right” so that our children will be the most intelligent, happiest and the most...

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How self-compassion can help you feel happier and more content

How self-compassion can help you feel happier and more content

When things aren't going the way we want them to, or we aren't coping as well as we think we should be, we can get caught up in criticising and judging ourselves. This can seem like a helpful and productive way to motivate ourselves to better actions and outcomes but...

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How to find alone time when you’re never alone

How to find alone time when you’re never alone

Alone time is an important part of caring for our wellbeing. Having time to just be who we are, to rest and relax, helps us feel happier, healthier, more energised and refreshed. Without it, in the long run, we can start to see negative impacts to our mental,...

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Confirmation bias: why your brain wants to prove you right

Confirmation bias: why your brain wants to prove you right

There's something important you need to know about your brain.  It likes to be right.  Being right feels good (thanks to the chemicals released in your brain) and it takes way less energy than always challenging your current view of the world. This means that, thanks...

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How to be a calmer, more connected parent

How to be a calmer, more connected parent

Do you ever wish you were a calmer parent? A more connected parent?  I think we all have moments where we miss the bar we set for ourselves in these areas. Parenting challenges us in ways we've never been challenged before and with every new child, and every new...

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How to ease loneliness in motherhood

How to ease loneliness in motherhood

Since late last year, I’ve had the privilege of looking after my stepdaughter’s beautiful baby girl once a week. It’s a pretty fortunate position to be in; I get to enjoy all the cuddles, smiles and fun, and build a lovely connection with her, but then (providing my...

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Is this the life you really want?

Is this the life you really want?

When you think about your life as it is now, how do you feel? How do you want to feel? How similar or different are your two responses?   I don’t know about you, but motherhood was not quite what I thought it would be.  Somehow, I thought it would be easier and...

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How to beat procrastination right now

How to beat procrastination right now

Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...

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Self compassionate alternatives to new year’s resolutions

Self compassionate alternatives to new year’s resolutions

From mid December and all the way through January we are surrounded by messages about reflecting on the year that is coming to an end and creating new year's resolutions. What did you achieve? What didn’t you achieve? How will you improve? What will you do next?  Who...

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Create the life you want by being 100% responsible

Create the life you want by being 100% responsible

It’s nearly the end of the year and many of us are reflecting, thinking about what we’ve accomplished (or not quite achieved), enjoyed, found challenging and what we want to be different for the coming year. How has 2019 been for you? Has it fulfilled you? Brought you...

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Set clear boundaries to stay sane and enjoy Christmas

Set clear boundaries to stay sane and enjoy Christmas

The Christmas season provides plenty of opportunities to go beyond your usual limits. For example: How much you spend How often you socialise How much alcohol you drink How many responsibilities you take on How much sleep you get What you eat Who you spend time with....

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Exhausted all the time? 7 types of rest you need

Exhausted all the time? 7 types of rest you need

“How are you?” “I'm exhausted all the time” “Well, that’s to be expected, you’re a mum!”   Have you ever had a conversation like that? It seems to be a commonly held belief that once you enter motherhood, you are destined to be exhausted for a looooong time. At...

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How to stop people pleasing

How to stop people pleasing

In my previous blog post, I wrote about how to say no with kindness and respect. While exploring the reasons that saying no is difficult, something came up that really resonated with the More to Mum community – people pleasing. I received numerous messages from mums,...

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How to say no with kindness and respect

How to say no with kindness and respect

I get asked for advice on how to say no all the time and I realised I hadn’t actually written a blog about it! So, here we are. Do you ever think “no, no, no, no, no “ and then hear the word “yes” slip out of your mouth? Or, do you say yes, and then spend ages feeling...

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How to practice mindfulness for a happier, calmer you

How to practice mindfulness for a happier, calmer you

Do you: Find it hard to focus or be present with the people you love? Notice your mind always racing, thinking of what’s next, worrying about the future and replaying the past? Find yourself on autopilot, not really conscious of what you're doing? Feel exhausted,...

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Build Your Tribe With People Who Are Right For You

Build Your Tribe With People Who Are Right For You

Have you found your tribe?   "You know, the ones that make you feel the most YOU. The ones that lift you up and help you remember who you really are. The ones that remind you that a blip in the road is just that, a blip. They are the ones that when you walk out...

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What are you saying yes and no to?

What are you saying yes and no to?

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links, and at no additional cost to you, I'll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the links. I'll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...

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Matrescence: why mothers are feeling lost and confused

Matrescence: why mothers are feeling lost and confused

Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...

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How to make and stick to a budget

How to make and stick to a budget

Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I'll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I'll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...

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What’s your definition of a successful day?

What’s your definition of a successful day?

Life comes with a multitude of definitions of success In my years as a corporate workaholic, my success was defined by a whole lot of external measures. The number of hours I worked, the company I worked at, the hierarchical level of my position, the targets I hit,...

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Healthy lunch and snack ideas for busy mums with little kids

Healthy lunch and snack ideas for busy mums with little kids

Are you so busy making sure that everyone else is looked after that you forget to look after yourself? Do you often forget to eat, or eat meals that are quick and easy, but lack nutrition? As mums, we tend to put everyone else’s needs and nutrition in front of our...

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How to be more present in your life – Part 2

How to be more present in your life – Part 2

This is part 2 in a 2 part blog post series on how to be more present in your life. You can find part 1 here.   In the first part of this blog series on how to be more present in your life, I shared this statistic with you: People are thinking about something...

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How to be more present in your life – Part 1

How to be more present in your life – Part 1

This is part 1 of a 2 part series on how to be more present in your life. You can find part 2 here.    Where are you right now? Physically, you might be at home, in the car, at work, at the park. Sitting, standing, lying down, rocking, walking. And you’re...

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8 surprising and effective ways to overcome overwhelm

8 surprising and effective ways to overcome overwhelm

I’ve had quite a lot of practice at dealing with overwhelm over the years. When I was younger, I was always so keen to be involved in everything and to do everything to my perfectionistic standards, that sometimes it all just became too much. I also had a tendency to...

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How to improve your relationships with mindful communication

How to improve your relationships with mindful communication

We are communicating all the time, with our significant other, our children, our friends and co-workers, but are we doing it in a mindful manner or are we just saying the first thing that comes to mind? Communication should be easy right?  We hear someone say...

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How to Get That Sexy Spark Back After Kids

How to Get That Sexy Spark Back After Kids

Turn up the heat in your bedroom Being parents is a lot of fun, and stress, but mainly fun. But, let’s not pretend it doesn’t make it hard when it comes to feeling sexy and finding “mummy and daddy” time. I know. I have three kids, I get it. So, let’s look at how we...

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5 reasons you should know and accept your strengths

5 reasons you should know and accept your strengths

One of the things that regularly strikes me in conversations with mums, is that so many of us are reluctant to acknowledge our own strengths. We've created some clever strategies for avoiding it. We deflect with humour, point out the things that are wrong with us,...

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How to sleep better: 10 practical strategies

How to sleep better: 10 practical strategies

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...

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What you need to know to change your relationship with anxiety

What you need to know to change your relationship with anxiety

The relationship that the majority of the population has with their anxiety is definitely not a very good one. It is often toxic, fractured and built up on a foundation of fear. I can already hear you ask, “Why would I have a good relationship with my anxiety??” or...

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15 helpful ways to deal with not feeling good enough

15 helpful ways to deal with not feeling good enough

So many mums feel like they are not good enough, every day. This feeling goes beyond mum guilt (which is already a challenge). Feeling not good enough creates shame within us. Brene Brown defines the difference between guilt and shame:   “I believe that guilt is...

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How to organise and tidy your kitchen so you like being in it

How to organise and tidy your kitchen so you like being in it

Whether we like it or not, caring for children involves constantly preparing and serving food and then cleaning up afterwards. Not only do our children (and partners) have to eat, and preferably eat well, we have to eat well to be able to function at our best,...

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