Perfectionism is patterns of thinking and behaviours driven by the constant need to be or appear perfect (without flaws). It could also be described as the need to avoid being inadequate (anything less than perfect). For many years I proudly called myself a...
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Blogs
How to interrupt the pattern of self blame
When my son was 4, he was playing in the playground after kindergarten and decided to give the monkey bars a try. He always watched the other children swinging across but still liked me to hold him as he moved his arms from bar to bar. This time he wanted to do it...
Returning to work: setting yourself up for a smoother transition – Part 2
This is part 2 of a two-part series on navigating your return to work. You can read part 1 here. Welcome back to this blog series on navigating your return to work! Returning to paid work (even if it's a job you love) can be a challenging and emotional experience....
Returning to work: setting yourself up for a smoother transition – Part 1
Before motherhood, I loved my job. I willingly put in long hours and massive amounts of effort and commitment to do a good job. I travelled regularly, took work home and derived a lot of satisfaction, pride and also a sense of identity from my paid work. As the...
Learning the art of letting go. Again.
Letting go is a lesson and practice we live through over and over again. Life continues to present us with new opportunities to let go and sometimes we have such a tight grip on things, it takes several attempts to fully release. I love this quote from Ahjan Chah: “If...
How to stop rushing through life
Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...
Are your expectations creating the reality you want?
When my son was about 16 months old, I started to think about returning to work. I'd always expected I would return to the demanding corporate job that I loved. That’s what career women do. I expected I would place my son in childcare. That’s what working mothers do....
How to deal with a bad day
I know that we’re expected to be loving motherhood, sailing through each day with a smile on our faces. That’s the myth of the perfect mum. In reality, we all have bad days and we don’t have to pretend that everything is wonderful when it’s not. Allowing ourselves to...
When self-care feels like another thing you have to get right
Ever feel like you’re getting this self-care thing wrong? Not doing enough or doing too much. Not wanting to do it, not enjoying it enough or doing it with so much guilt. Not being consistent, not sticking to your plans or not starting at all. Not doing the right...
Goodbye perfectionism, I don’t need you anymore
Dear Perfectionism, I’ve decided it’s time we parted ways. We’ve been together a long time. I’m not even sure how it happened, but somewhere in childhood you became my constant companion. You came with me into adulthood and by that time I thought you were an asset. I...
When you feel like you’ve lost your identity in motherhood
I don't know about you, but no one ever mentioned to me that motherhood might change who I am. I received plenty of advice and information about how to care for my baby and some guidance around how to tend to my own practical needs, like sleep, nutrition and...
How to deal with anger in motherhood – Part 2
Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...
How to deal with anger in motherhood – Part 1
I’m fascinated by volcanoes. My heart raced with excitement and awe when I stood in the hot steam rising from the ground, walked across kilometres of lava rock, and flew in a helicopter over the crater of the active volcano in Hawaii. When...
5 things that help create balance in your life
Balance. It can be a tricky topic. Some women idealise the concept of balance and are constantly trying to achieve it. Others reject the idea that it’s possible and refuse to use the word at all. Some prefer to call it integration or harmony. Let's have a quick look...
The value of connection when motherhood throws you a curveball
In this blog, I'm delighted to introduce you to Hayley Thiele, mum, step mum and Founder of Mummy Matcher. Hayley was thrown a curve ball in her motherhood journey and is now using her experiences to help other mums who are craving connection with someone who...
The beliefs that are making it hard for you to take a break
Does taking a break feel impossible? The sheer thought it makes you anxious or uncomfortable? Motherhood can feel all consuming, and when you add all the other responsibilities you're carrying, there just doesn’t seem to be time for a break. I’m not even necessarily...
How to make exercise easier and boost your mood
Many mums have told me that while they know exercise is important for wellbeing, they struggle to make it a part of their regular activities. That's why I've invited Claire Cole, Personal Trainer and Founder of Movement for Mums, to share her insights into how to make...
Journalling tips: how to make it easy, manageable and enjoyable
Ever thought about journaling but don’t know where to start, how to find the time or how to get it right? Maybe you're reluctant to confront those emotions and thoughts you’re currently keeping under wraps? Maybe you’ve tried it, and weren’t able to be...
Gut health – why is it so important?
You may have heard the buzz around gut health lately. It seems like gut health is the new “in vogue” thing when it comes to the health industry and the products marketed to us at the moment. Luckily, this is one trend that I can really get behind, because the...
Why a good enough mother is truly good enough
Do you feel like you’re constantly comparing yourself or being compared to the ideal of a perfect mother? With so much information and advice out there “helping” us to get things “right” so that our children will be the most intelligent, happiest and the most...
How self-compassion can help you feel happier and more content
When things aren't going the way we want them to, or we aren't coping as well as we think we should be, we can get caught up in criticising and judging ourselves. This can seem like a helpful and productive way to motivate ourselves to better actions and outcomes but...
How to find alone time when you’re never alone
Alone time is an important part of caring for our wellbeing. Having time to just be who we are, to rest and relax, helps us feel happier, healthier, more energised and refreshed. Without it, in the long run, we can start to see negative impacts to our mental,...
Confirmation bias: why your brain wants to prove you right
There's something important you need to know about your brain. It likes to be right. Being right feels good (thanks to the chemicals released in your brain) and it takes way less energy than always challenging your current view of the world. This means that, thanks...
How to be a calmer, more connected parent
Do you ever wish you were a calmer parent? A more connected parent? I think we all have moments where we miss the bar we set for ourselves in these areas. Parenting challenges us in ways we've never been challenged before and with every new child, and every new...
How to ease loneliness in motherhood
Since late last year, I’ve had the privilege of looking after my stepdaughter’s beautiful baby girl once a week. It’s a pretty fortunate position to be in; I get to enjoy all the cuddles, smiles and fun, and build a lovely connection with her, but then (providing my...
Is this the life you really want?
When you think about your life as it is now, how do you feel? How do you want to feel? How similar or different are your two responses? I don’t know about you, but motherhood was not quite what I thought it would be. Somehow, I thought it would be easier and...
How to beat procrastination right now
Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...
Self compassionate alternatives to new year’s resolutions
From mid December and all the way through January we are surrounded by messages about reflecting on the year that is coming to an end and creating new year's resolutions. What did you achieve? What didn’t you achieve? How will you improve? What will you do next? Who...
Create the life you want by being 100% responsible
It’s nearly the end of the year and many of us are reflecting, thinking about what we’ve accomplished (or not quite achieved), enjoyed, found challenging and what we want to be different for the coming year. How has 2019 been for you? Has it fulfilled you? Brought you...
Set clear boundaries to stay sane and enjoy Christmas
The Christmas season provides plenty of opportunities to go beyond your usual limits. For example: How much you spend How often you socialise How much alcohol you drink How many responsibilities you take on How much sleep you get What you eat Who you spend time with....