Worry is a chain of negative thoughts about bad things that might happen in the future (Brene Brown, "Altas of the Heart"). It is a coping strategy we tend to employ when we feel anxious because we think (perhaps subconsciously) that it is helpful. Worrying feels...
Mindset is at the heart of everything we do. It impacts the way we see ourselves and others, the way we connect with our children and loved ones, the way we look after ourselves and the way we respond to challenges and changes. Our mindset directly impacts our happiness, resilience and what happens in our lives. Here you’ll find practical information, tips and stories from my own experience that will help you develop a helpful mindset for a happier, more confident life.
Releasing unsupportive beliefs with Root Cause Therapy
The beliefs we hold form the lens through which we view and interpret the world around us and all our experiences. They help us make sense of situations and inform our decisions and actions. This happens both consciously and subconsciously. Some of our beliefs support...
What I wish I had known at the beginning of motherhood
In this article, we hear from Rachel Preston Broughton, who has two beautiful children and generously shares with us her reflections on motherhood so far. Enjoy reading about the things Rachel wishes she had known back when she first became a mother. As a mum...
4 Steps to help you break free from the perfect mother myth
Perfection is so alluring. We love our children so deeply that it makes sense that we would want to give them the best start to life and the best opportunity to flourish through being the perfect mum. We are parenting in a society that places excessive pressure on...
Why you don’t need to feel happy all the time
Be positive! Look on the bright side! Good vibes only! Do you feel like you should be happy all the time? Happiness is celebrated and heavily promoted in our society (just think about all the happy people you see in marketing campaigns). We adopt it as a goal to work...
How to stop struggling with difficult thoughts
Our brains are constantly on the lookout for things that might harm us and in doing so, they create a lot of difficult thoughts. These thoughts might relate to pain from the past, challenges we are facing in the present or fear about the future. Positive thinking is...
Is overfunctioning creating more stress in your life?
Overfunctioning can be simpler to understand than to spot in our lives because people who overfunction tend to be seen as very responsible, reliable, helpful, competent and caring. They do all the things for all the people. Society celebrates people who are constantly...
Is balance in motherhood a myth?
Do you wish you had more balance in your life? Have you been trying to get there but somehow can’t quite get it right? Be kind to yourself, lovely. Balance can feel like an elusive goal. When we look around at other mums on social media and in our lives and they...
Can you ever give yourself too much self-compassion?
Recently, a beautiful woman in the More to Mum community asked me if you could ever give yourself too much self-compassion. She wondered if there was a point where you just had to take accountability for what you’ve done and do better. As I listened to her describe...
Tools to manage your frustrations
We all experience frustration in motherhood. As explained by Brené Brown in her book "Atlas of the Heart", frustration occurs when something that feels out of our control is preventing us from achieving our desired outcome. We don't think that we can fix the...
Resentment in motherhood: How to work through this difficult emotion
Have you felt resentment in motherhood? Resentment is one of those emotions that we wish we didn’t have, yet it can feel so justified. It’s not an enjoyable way to feel and most of us don’t want to be perceived as resentful or bitter. Women often feel guilty for...
Why it’s hard to be present in the moment
Recently I was listening to a podcast, and I had to replay the first 10 minutes four times because my mind kept wandering! Do you find it hard to stay present in the moment? You're not the only one. I often get asked for advice about how to be more present in our...
Meditation made easy for mums and kids – Part 2
This is part 2 of a two-part blog series about making meditation easy and manageable for both mums and kids. In this series, I'm talking to Alysse Di Natale, founder of Young Yoga and the Meditate with Friends app. Alysse is passionate about supporting the wellbeing...
Meditation made easy for mums and kids – Part 1
Have you ever wanted to try meditation but felt that it was too hard, time-consuming, spiritual or that you just weren't any good at emptying your mind? I hear these concerns from lots of women who have heard about the benefits of meditation but aren't sure if can...
How to get what you want in your relationship
Parenthood changes relationships. With small people to focus on, less sleep, less time together, new challenges and stress, and your own massive transformation (matrescence), your relationship with your partner takes the strain. Many women feel alone, disconnected,...
How to worry less and deal with the fear of what might happen
There is no shortage of things we can worry about in motherhood, regardless of what stage we are in. Worry is thinking about all the potentially negative (from your perspective) possibilities that could eventuate in the future. The what-ifs. Sometimes these...
Navigating the pressure to be productive all the time
A man walks through the door and greets his wife. “What did you do today?”, he asks. “Nothing” she says in a weary tone. “I didn’t get anything done!” Truth is, she’s hardly taken a breath. She’s spent her entire day cleaning and tidying, preparing food, organising,...
Let’s not call ourselves bad mums anymore
Have you ever called yourself a bad mum, either out loud or in your mind? I certainly have and I know many other mums have too. I’ve been thinking about this label that we use. Why is it so prevalent? What does it even mean? And what is the impact of using it? I’m...
5 strategies to help you overcome perfectionism
Society tells us that perfectionism is a good thing. Perhaps you too have been praised and rewarded for your high capacity, high standards, and meticulous work. You may have also believed that perfectionism was the same as trying your best and showing your commitment...
Have we got the definition of a strong woman wrong?
How would you define a strong woman? Perhaps you might use some of the following descriptions: Physically strong Confident Hard to persuade Unflappable Resilient Determined Independent In control Focused on her goals. I used to think that being a strong woman...
How our children invite us to learn and grow
Have you ever heard that saying that goes something like “I was a much better parent before I had children”? I love it. Parenting is often much harder than we expect. We imagine that parenting will involve joyous afternoons at the park, quiet snuggles on the lounge (I...
How to ask for help
You know you need some help and you’ve decided you’re going to ask for it. That’s a huge step in itself. Asking for help can be really hard, especially for mothers in modern society where there are some very unrealistic expectations placed on women to do it all,...
Why it’s so hard to ask for help
“Can you help me?” Four little words. They seem so simple yet mothers everywhere find them near impossible to say. What makes it hard is the meaning we attribute to asking for help. Without that meaning, asking for help is a neutral activity, neither positive or...
Automatic Negative Thoughts: How to Identify and Manage Them
Automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) are stories that we tell ourselves that aren’t necessarily true. They are distortions or negative interpretations of ourselves, what is happening around us, the past or the future, based on our beliefs and assumptions. ANTs happen...
Why mothers need to speak up instead of staying silent
Have there been times when you have you kept quiet when you had something to say? For example, when... Someone crossed your boundary or hurt you? Another child mistreated your child? You didn’t want to do something you were being asked to do? You didn’t agree? Someone...
Think you might be a perfectionist? 10 signs to look for
Perfectionism is patterns of thinking and behaviours driven by the constant need to be or appear perfect (without flaws). It could also be described as the need to avoid being inadequate (anything less than perfect). For many years I proudly called myself a...
How to interrupt the pattern of self blame
When my son was 4, he was playing in the playground after kindergarten and decided to give the monkey bars a try. He always watched the other children swinging across but still liked me to hold him as he moved his arms from bar to bar. This time he wanted to do it...
Returning to work: setting yourself up for a smoother transition – Part 2
This is part 2 of a two-part series on navigating your return to work. You can read part 1 here. Welcome back to this blog series on navigating your return to work! Returning to paid work (even if it's a job you love) can be a challenging and emotional experience....
Returning to work: setting yourself up for a smoother transition – Part 1
Before motherhood, I loved my job. I willingly put in long hours and massive amounts of effort and commitment to do a good job. I travelled regularly, took work home and derived a lot of satisfaction, pride and also a sense of identity from my paid work. As the...
Learning the art of letting go. Again.
Letting go is a lesson and practice we live through over and over again. Life continues to present us with new opportunities to let go and sometimes we have such a tight grip on things, it takes several attempts to fully release. I love this quote from Ahjan Chah: “If...