When your own wellbeing is compromised, it’s incredibly difficult to look after your children’s wellbeing. Especially in the longer term. Self care is not a luxury. It’s not selfish and it doesn’t mean you don’t love your children as much as yourself. Self care is something all mums need and deserve. Think “me too” rather than “me first”. I am passionate about making self care manageable and realistic in the midst of the chaos of motherhood. Here you’ll find lots of inspiration, tips and examples to help you look after yourself. You matter too.
There is no shortage of things we can worry about in motherhood, regardless of what stage we are in. Worry is thinking about all the potentially negative (from your perspective) possibilities that could eventuate in the future. The what-ifs. Sometimes these...
A man walks through the door and greets his wife. “What did you do today?”, he asks. “Nothing” she says in a weary tone. “I didn’t get anything done!” Truth is, she’s hardly taken a breath. She’s spent her entire day cleaning and tidying, preparing food, organising,...
Have you ever called yourself a bad mum, either out loud or in your mind? I certainly have and I know many other mums have too. I’ve been thinking about this label that we use. Why is it so prevalent? What does it even mean? And what is the impact of using it? I’m...
Society tells us that perfectionism is a good thing. Perhaps you too have been praised and rewarded for your high capacity, high standards, and meticulous work. You may have also believed that perfectionism was the same as trying your best and showing your commitment...
How would you define a strong woman? Perhaps you might use some of the following descriptions: Physically strong Confident Hard to persuade Unflappable Resilient Determined Independent In control Focused on her goals. I used to think that being a strong woman...
Have you ever heard that saying that goes something like “I was a much better parent before I had children”? I love it. Parenting is often much harder than we expect. We imagine that parenting will involve joyous afternoons at the park, quiet snuggles on the lounge (I...
Do you know what your personal values are? Defining and aligning to our personal values can help us feel motivated, inspired and live a rich and meaningful life. When we know what’s most important to us we can look for ways to have more of this in our lives. In...
You know you need some help and you’ve decided you’re going to ask for it. That’s a huge step in itself. Asking for help can be really hard, especially for mothers in modern society where there are some very unrealistic expectations placed on women to do it all,...
“Can you help me?” Four little words. They seem so simple yet mothers everywhere find them near impossible to say. What makes it hard is the meaning we attribute to asking for help. Without that meaning, asking for help is a neutral activity, neither positive or...
Automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) are stories that we tell ourselves that aren’t necessarily true. They are distortions or negative interpretations of ourselves, what is happening around us, the past or the future, based on our beliefs and assumptions. ANTs happen...
We all know that if you have a healthy reproductive cycle, we have a period every 28 days or so, but did you know that there is a constant evolution happening inside of you each month - the way we feel, act, burn energy in the middle of the month is very different to...
Have there been times when you have you kept quiet when you had something to say? For example, when... Someone crossed your boundary or hurt you? Another child mistreated your child? You didn’t want to do something you were being asked to do? You didn’t agree? Someone...
Sadness, burnout, fear, guilt, anxiety, loneliness, frustration, anger, resentment, shame, embarrassment, disgust. Mothers feel them. But often we don’t like to talk about them. What will people think? If perfect mum is always composed, in control, calm, happy, on top...
Perfectionism is patterns of thinking and behaviours driven by the constant need to be or appear perfect (without flaws). It could also be described as the need to avoid being inadequate (anything less than perfect). For many years I proudly called myself a...
When my son was 4, he was playing in the playground after kindergarten and decided to give the monkey bars a try. He always watched the other children swinging across but still liked me to hold him as he moved his arms from bar to bar. This time he wanted to do it...
This is part 2 of a two-part series on navigating your return to work. You can read part 1 here. Welcome back to this blog series on navigating your return to work! Returning to paid work (even if it's a job you love) can be a challenging and emotional experience....
Before motherhood, I loved my job. I willingly put in long hours and massive amounts of effort and commitment to do a good job. I travelled regularly, took work home and derived a lot of satisfaction, pride and also a sense of identity from my paid work. As the...
Letting go is a lesson and practice we live through over and over again. Life continues to present us with new opportunities to let go and sometimes we have such a tight grip on things, it takes several attempts to fully release. I love this quote from Ahjan Chah: “If...
Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...
When my son was about 16 months old, I started to think about returning to work. I'd always expected I would return to the demanding corporate job that I loved. That’s what career women do. I expected I would place my son in childcare. That’s what working mothers do....
I know that we’re expected to be loving motherhood, sailing through each day with a smile on our faces. That’s the myth of the perfect mum. In reality, we all have bad days and we don’t have to pretend that everything is wonderful when it’s not. Allowing ourselves to...
Ever feel like you’re getting this self-care thing wrong? Not doing enough or doing too much. Not wanting to do it, not enjoying it enough or doing it with so much guilt. Not being consistent, not sticking to your plans or not starting at all. Not doing the right...
Dear Perfectionism, I’ve decided it’s time we parted ways. We’ve been together a long time. I’m not even sure how it happened, but somewhere in childhood you became my constant companion. You came with me into adulthood and by that time I thought you were an asset. I...
I don't know about you, but no one ever mentioned to me that motherhood might change who I am. I received plenty of advice and information about how to care for my baby and some guidance around how to tend to my own practical needs, like sleep, nutrition and...
Disclosure: This post contains an affiliate link, and at no additional cost to you, I’ll earn a small commission if you decide to purchase after clicking through the link. I’ll only ever recommend things that I love and believe will help you, and the decision to...
I’m fascinated by volcanoes. My heart raced with excitement and awe when I stood in the hot steam rising from the ground, walked across kilometres of lava rock, and flew in a helicopter over the crater of the active volcano in Hawaii. When...
Balance. It can be a tricky topic. Some women idealise the concept of balance and are constantly trying to achieve it. Others reject the idea that it’s possible and refuse to use the word at all. Some prefer to call it integration or harmony. Let's have a quick look...
In this blog, I'm delighted to introduce you to Hayley Thiele, mum, step mum and Founder of She Can Thrive. Hayley was thrown a curve ball in her motherhood journey and is now using her experiences to help other mums who are craving connection with someone who...
Does taking a break feel impossible? The sheer thought it makes you anxious or uncomfortable? Motherhood can feel all consuming, and when you add all the other responsibilities you're carrying, there just doesn’t seem to be time for a break. I’m not even necessarily...
Many mums have told me that while they know exercise is important for wellbeing, they struggle to make it a part of their regular activities. That's why I've invited Claire Cole, Personal Trainer and Founder of Movement for Mums, to share her insights into how to make...